Cannot keep looking for love with mirrors and mirror people 

I looked to my parents to show me love 

and god above

but I remember so little of my traumatic past 

cast into the fires of hell

where I can’t tell 

heaven from hades 

light from shade 

a knife a blade from a blade of grass

I look to be fore filled 

which of our wills

is greater

I am no hater of humanity

we are all mirrors 

of what we’ve been shown

but I won’t end up cold and alone

by choice 

I will find my inner voice 

my inner sense 

of love 

because I am stronger than relying on friends 

and family to tell me who I am

I don’t need my reflection to know I am real

I clench at this life with zeal

and eyes of steely determination.

Unseen

I live in the sadness and the madness of being unseen

I dream

of beauty

having a beautiful woman’s smile in my eyes 

starry skies 

Holding her hand

but this life happens in the meantime

Unplanned 

I am unseen invisible 

divisible miserable behind four walls 

a boy born with a huge soul 

now small

My confidence and ego a full ballon 

then shrinking like a soggy deflated one

like lungs I breathe in life

and exhale sadness 

madness is all I have but aren’t we all the same?

invisible and visceral ethereal like ghosts 

people pleasing and wheezing just to be heard…