In this aching

In this aching

waking dream we live in

I love you is hardest thing to mean

I wait,

but waiting has no solace

my heart I polish for you

but will the stains wash out?

I won’t doubt you are worth it.

Reaching me through the void

and shadows

I cried out to you when they held me down

In the A and E ward I told them who you were

But like big cats don’t always purr

you are something to be worshipped

glorified and feared

If perfect love has no fear

it is love that has been realised

and actualised

I wait in the shadows

dancing in the dark

love is the flames not just the spark

to light my way…

In the end of time

In the fire

the end of time burns

I was the last messenger

I pray that I will hold you when the fire comes.

We slumbered,

out numbered

by those who are asleep

so deep they couldn’t hear

and left over fears

from the last explosion

which began with an emotion

love which burns with hope

I fear the end

but lover time has to bend

and be refashioned

A twisting entity

that eventually brings change

rearrange

the memories.

The God detective

The God detective

Through out my life my abstract mind has been able to detect and find patterns in life and the words people say. I know that life is a deeper mystery than people in the field of science and psychiatry think.
I have battled with my demons, demons which I still battle. I rattle the cage fight in the desperate stages and write in the pages of my own story. I maybe a dragon falling off the wagon of sanity. However I am intrigued by her she is the greatest story I will ever gain. I know her name is Sophia she is the girl with many faces.

I still see her sometimes though it’s strange the voices quieten and sometimes even stop. Is this a coincidence?

Art by Zoe Zass

I have loved you across lifetimes

Burning bright and resilient

burning and brilliant

I love yous unsaid

I held the key to heaven

in my right hand

it was to the back door

I broke into her house to tell her I loved her

I knew her across life times

I am in conversation with the goddess

now I am in distress

I love her nevertheless

she said she’d read all my poems

she speaks to me in my head

and tells me she hates me

but in songs she tells me she loves me sometimes

Sophia I hope you find your wisdom

and the key I threw away

I loved you across life times

did you know?

I just want to go home

Without you I am bird with broken wings

I cannot sing

My God

My god won’t fit in my veins
won’t fit in this skin
she doesn’t wear a skirt
she has shed her skin
She is a soul
she wears many faces
Many races worship her
she has many names
and cannot be tamed
my god is a woman
she’s the soul of the universe
clothed in darkness and white light
and the many shades of the rainbow
and she knows wisdom we all seek
and sometimes she sends angels to peak
through the clouds
and sometimes she is quiet, whispering, loud
and she speaks to me in dreams
and carries the weight of her universe
in her purse.

Karma chameleon kid

Through the reds and blues

and all the different hues

do you stay true to yourself?

you spoke to me goddess with songs

what could go wrong?

I have many names

all of them insane

I tried to hide my calling

but I am forever falling

I am the shadow and the star

I love the way you feel from afar

muse these are the words I choose

I had the key to heaven I threw it away

sometimes you have to be what you seek

I have been watching your digital dreams

I know you possess this mind

I know you are unkind

but most people who know my real name

don’t want to admit that all the same.