In the war on myself
Its my dreams that matter
compassion is a choice
I choose to believe or is it that a lie?
In my 30 years or so of life has always been a battle
But my dreams matter
and that “Once upon a time” is a land where my heart exists
But unless I grasp at my ideals I will never reveal
What people think of me
I do love me
In the future I will still take myself to task
It will be clear that I may fail
only fools presume I don’t have the strength to go on.
NOW READ BOTTOM TO TOP.
I am sending you my hopes and prayers
but I swear there will be no Hollywood endings
I am sending you my dreams and aspirations
born of perspiration
and tears
But there are no fairy tales here.
Set sail for distant lands
But it’s all just dust and sand
I know there is magic I heard it on the freezing breeze
in the coughs of old men
but life can’t give you a happy ending
you have to find it yourself
and accept it for what it is…
My guide
I know you won’t believe me.
I know you probably won’t see things from my point of view
I know your heart is beating faster than freight train
but I am you.
As the universe divides and fragments
I can see things that were meant and never meant
that were and never were
in your eyes,
the dreaming of starry skies
the Sunday morning rainbows
the sun that glows
the words permeating your story’s pages with ink
the way we sunk and sink
into grasping the everlasting
you by no means are not a failure
you are the sea the ship I sail on and yeah
I know it’s a sea of salty tears
blown by the winds of love and overblown fears
but you are my guide
a force I cannot hide
as I take my strides
you are my power of three
and my truth I long to see.
The truth
Twisted to a make a weapon for fools
perspective is not a collective entity
eventually will we see
that truth is a hydra
a multi faced dragon
but the only way to have justice
is to discover the rightful face
in the echoes of sanity
we will see the truth displayed
Hallucinations in my mind
carelessly unkind
stories in time
lies told
the truth smeared like ink
the pen tangled with delusions
confusing skin
I close my mind you enter in
the night howls
I cower
hour by hour
will the sky fall
I dream for us all
or it seems that way
I hallucinate a story
I cannot tell
my own personal hell
and yet heaven resides in there as well.
Sadness doesn’t stain skin
or truth pierce a heart
but I reckon you will feel sadness is life’s art
and contrasting happiness
although not merely pain alleviated
I meditate,
I mediate
between the angel
we try to be
and the devil
who’s eyes we see in the mirror
the constant battle
between letting go
and belonging to the life you know.
Do I really like poetry?
Do I like the words, the rhythms
the meanings driven
up the motorways of life?
the cars spilling out pollution
the arguments with the wife
do I like the metaphors and similes
that are born from revelations and strife?
I like lyrics
Lyrically well placed
we played puns
heart strings strummed
I like the cadence of thoughts
the odd political retaught
the answers to the universe that fit on a postcard
and s-t-r-e-t-c-h
Across the forest of pines
but I want to find the answers that are mine
that is why I write
to set my own page alight
with my own theories
I must never become too weary
world worn
I answer your lies with a word storm
and the words become me.
I am not an octopus
I am a poet who bleeds ink
I sink, words tattoo the page
blood and scars
look at the way
my love is tar
thick like blue ichor
of the gods
I love you like anxiety from afar
butterflies and broken tickers
hearts on fire
with the oil of desire.
Suicide an shiny empty packet
War on the poor and disabled the governments criminal racket
What we leave behind only pollution
Only distortion
Only a walking abortion
Change your ways and your fate
Don’t give way to hate
Stand firm
We are not worms food
Don’t regret your life in any form
You were given a life from when you were born
Not empty
Or tragic
Give birth to magic
In this pen tangle
Create an angel
Out of the ashes
Of heart shaped gashes
Love is the twin sister of hate
and the dark is to light
Learn to master the fight
and hate inaction
Be the master of action
Leave the page full of words
and the sky full of birds
Which nest in the tree
We have grown
Don’t die alone…