Tag Archives: hope
Unexpected artwork
The way the sunlight causes shadows through the leaves.
The movements of trees on the breeze
sycamore seeds twirl in pirouettes
as they helicopter to the ground.
Hag stones form
magic is born
from impermanence
decaying ghosts of leaves
erosion flowing free
the changing of the seasons
the reasons of life and death.
Unexpected artwork of nature
forming then fracturing and breaking.
The caricature of a feather floating free
in the minds artwork free
as a bird in rapture
captured in a photo in my minds eye.
The woman with many faces
In the darkness and light of a daydream from a distant heaven. The woman with many faces but one soul. I have looked at legends and myths. She is a gift. To live many lives and still remember some of them is her curse.
I remember she woke my kaleidoscopic mind like in the song porcelain by Moby. A conversation between the two of us. Her timelines spread across mine. Her heart and soul a beacon for mine.
Giving me a reason for life and seeing beyond the illusion of separation. She has been living all the lives I see through the collective unconscious the Holy Spirit is a girl a woman a mother a sister a friend a lover and so much more. Life would be a mistake without her music. She speaks through the crowd words of wisdom that guide me.
I have been labelled schizophrenic but I can see her spirit in all things. The way the wind moves the trees leaves she is one who guides us all. Oneness is what I have found I am her protector I love her darkness her light some may say I have lost my mind. And all the unkind things but those people are blind.
In this aching
In this aching
waking dream we live in
I love you is hardest thing to mean
I wait,
but waiting has no solace
my heart I polish for you
but will the stains wash out?
I won’t doubt you are worth it.
Reaching me through the void
and shadows
I cried out to you when they held me down
In the A and E ward I told them who you were
But like big cats don’t always purr
you are something to be worshipped
glorified and feared
If perfect love has no fear
it is love that has been realised
and actualised
I wait in the shadows
dancing in the dark
love is the flames not just the spark
to light my way…
If I wasn’t depressed
I’d launch myself across the room
to collide with your lips
put my hands around your waist your hips
If I wasn’t depressed
I enjoy the simple things
a paper crown would make me feel like a king
I’d wrap up myself with smiles
I’d dress with style
if I wasn’t depressed I’d sing
songs wild and free
life would be love and not the sting
Of fear.
Hope for the future
When we look to the future
let’s remind ourselves that the sun
shines all the time for everyone
and in making dreams
with possibilities
we distill hope
and our faith carries us on
even if like a candles it flickers
we will relight the flame
because we know love is the Holy Spirit’s
name.
Sometimes
Sometimes
The world goes on behind my window
I stare out into the suns glare
I wrap myself around my thoughts
and all that I have sought
do I still care?
Sometimes
I am broken beggar
trying to get a leg up
sometimes I want to say
words of meaning
am I still dreaming?
Sometimes
my hearts soft like paper
sometimes it’s hard like a diamond
fashioned with pressure and heat
sometimes I play my songs on repeat
hoping to make my way to someone’s smile on the street.
Sometimes
I bow to the dark
sometimes I look to the stars sparkling in the sky
sometimes I want to die
but I realise life is short
and I love my friends to much to make this life end
so my epitaph will say I loved until my world drifted away
but I left you my words and that’s more than ok.
I come from a lost home
I come from
A lost home
my psychosis at 16
two years of hell
Dad and mum threw me out
My roots broken
Then Living in hostel
With Creaking fire safe doors
council estate yellow bricks and concrete
Dirty mirky stained glass windows
looking out on the world
Not a church
where I would fashion ideals
But a place I could be at peace and reshape my soul
Even in a place which had a
scent of old burnt out cigarettes
Smokey stained furniture
like an old fashioned bed and breakfast
The kitchen smelt of convenience.
Packs of chicken and beef super noodles
Boiling in a pan.
This is where freedom started
Hope in the darkness
Grey days but sometimes occasional sun
Dance music blaring from my boom box
a CD player in my room
chemical brothers basement jaxx tracks
Paper and pen
Penning poems
finding myself
I still loved a girl called Becky
who didn’t love me
I gave up,drinking as my mental health was suffering
Giving up the poison
for my own piece of mind.
Always Start with hope
when you begin your journey,
start with hope
when you build your castle,
start with hope
when you plant your tree,
start with hope
though the night may draw in
and you may lose sometimes
and bruise your skin
remember that hope
and don’t cave in
when you’re at a disadvantage
like when I was born with blue feet with the chord wrapped around my neck
when people said I’d never amount to anything
because they respected my mental health diagnosis more than me
they didn’t see the hope inside my heart
start with hope
that’s the only way
to fight on in darkest of days.
Boy in the corner
Boy in the corner
stares into space
boy in the corner
falls asleep what a disgrace
it’s school, lesson time
learning about life
Boy in the corner
Don’t you want a job and a wife?
teacher makes fun
boy in the corner
why are you a daydreamer?
or are you just dumb?
everyday there stare through you
you feel numb
sadness is the only way
to live your parents blame you
they blame each other
boy in the corner
you will soon have a sister and brother
Boy in the corner
its time for college
aren’t you glad
boy in the corner you lost your temper are you mad?
The question hangs in the air
boy in the corner
with hell in your head
Boy in the corner
you identify with Jesus but he’s dead
Boy in the corner
Now you’re in handcuffs
You told the police your him
in a police cell causing a din
they gave you your sins
told your sectioned
and need correction
Boy in the corner
taken to psychiatric hospital
in police wagon
facing the dragon that is insanity of life
you don’t want to eat
For fear of the devil inside your mind
Hated by yourself and unkind
The only way out is not believe your own lies
Boy in the corner
You will your right your wrongs
Boy in the corner you are strong
Stay strong in the character you have chosen
your heart is hot not frozen
Boy in the corner you will climb that mountain
Experience that kiss
Love that woman
you will come through this
boy in the corner
Your heart is fierce
boy in the corner
You are man
you will make the haters understand.